Let’s Talk About Sex – Women Talk

Let’s Talk About Sex – Women Talk

Hi there! If you are reading this it is probably because you are a woman and you want to talk to other women about struggles that we are facing in our everyday lives. I thought it is better for all of us to just jump straight into it and not beat around the bush. We are here today, talking about one thing that for some might be embarrassing, for some may be interesting and for rest might be just a normal thing that you want to discover and learn more about.

So let’s start by defining sex. I mean, not the literal definition of it, no. Let’s just think about what sex means and is to us. Just stop for a second and think about what the best sex looks like for you. What do you like, what is you biggest no-no, what turns you on. I believe you probably know most of this stuff already but if not – there’s no problem. We are here to help each other and help discover things about yourself you didn’t know.

Why talking about sex is important?

It makes us feel more confident about what we are doing. We can discover a lot of surprising things about our partners and what they like. We can even shock ourselves with what we like to do in bed. Talking about this makes us understand better the meaning of it, the purpose of it and the enjoyment of it. Try to find your own definition of sex.

My definition of sex is “two people, being intimate, knowing what they’re doing and what they both like, so sex can be the best every time”. Simple, yet there is so many things I had to learn and discover to get to that point.

So the first question I’d like you to ask yourself is “Is my sex life enough for me?” and try to give the answer straight away. I am not going to ask what was your answer because in the end of the day it is something you should keep between you and your partner – at least in some measures. So today’s post I just want you to be honest with yourself. After all, having a good sex life is important for both sides – men and women.

What are our sex struggles as women?

I am pretty sure that some of us were in a situation where you weren’t fully satisfied but your man didn’t know as you felt too embarrassed to say anything so you just pretended to be happy with it. Am I right? Or when your partner was “too tired” to finish you off so you had to do it yourself? Don’t even start me on men thinking that satisfying us by going down is gross but us going down on them is totally fine. I feel like most of us have been in that or similar situation. And it sucks.

The saying “struggle is real” was never as accurate as with the sex talk.

Now, I understand that many of you can be really put off with all the talking about sex and intimacy but I believe that talking about it with other women can be really eye-opening and reassuring so let’s talk about it in the comments. What are your sex struggles? What pisses you off? What do you want to know?

There is no shame in admitting that we are kind of disappointed when our partner is finishing too fast and leaves us to take care of ourselves alone. There is no shame in saying that maybe you are fed up with normal sex and you need a little bit more of excitement like trying new positions or even new places. There is no shame in having toys in your bedside table so you can spice things up. Anything can help you discover yourself – you just have to reach for it.

What to do when partner doesn’t care about our needs?

I say – talk. Communication is the key when it comes to sex. Don’t hide things from each other, don’t try to pretend that it doesn’t bother you. Open your mouth and say something. I know it might be hard at the beginning and probably will be awkward as hell but the more you do it, the more you will see that your sex life is changing. Trust me on this. Sit down with your partner and recall the last time you had sex. What went wrong? What went right? What do you want to improve? What do you want to stop? Just let everything out.

The struggle with body image

I know that there are some women that are very conscious about how they look. Maybe you were pregnant and you belly doesn’t look the same as before. Maybe your boobs are saggy and you feel like this will turn your partner off. Or maybe you’re plus size babe that doesn’t feel confident enough to have sex with the light on. ALL OF THESE PROBLEMS CAN GO BUGGER OFF! Listen, if your partner is with you right now it probably doesn’t matter to them how you look because they love you as you are. You are the most precious thing for them and sex for men is just like a cherry on cake. They probably don’t care if your boobs are saggy, small, perky or if your belly is jiggly. They want you to feel as good as they do. They want to see you enjoying it, not stressing about how you look.

If you still have some problems with your body image, try to talk to your partner about it (yes, talking is the key – I will say it as many times it needs to be said). It really helps to hear your partner saying that he love every inch of your body and that you have nothing to worry about. If he doesn’t say that – does he really loves you?

QUESTIONS TIME!

Here are some questions you can ask your partner:

  • What do you like in bed?
  • How do you feel about using toys?
  • Shall we try having sex in different positions?
  • What don’t you like in bed?
  • How can we improve our sex life?
  • What’s the biggest no-no to you?
  • What is the limit for you when it comes to sex?
  • Is there anything that bothers you about me?

Now it is your turn!

In the comments section below I want you to ask questions, give advice, share a story! Remember to be anonymous (do not include your real name or links to your site. You can use a nickname or a fake name). Any comments that are not anonymous are going to be deleted from the discussion.

Let’s talk about sex!

Mix The Colours In Your Home The Right Way

Mix The Colours In Your Home The Right Way

Disclaimer: I am not a professional home designer. I do not have a degree. I just like home decor and wanted to share my view with all of you.

I don’t know about you but I like when people comment on my home decor. I like to hear that they like it and that my home looks pretty with the colours I chose. I kinda like advising about it too, especially when someone asks me for it. Well, nobody asked for this blog post but I figured that it would be nice to share my views on how to mix colours in your house the right way.

There are so many combinations you can use. With painting and decorations – there are no limits. It all depends on your taste and how you want your home to look. Is it a homey vibe? Boho? Modern? Colourful? It all depends on you. Nowadays people go for more neutral colours like white and woods which for me is the cosiest look you can get. Some people prefer to have a pop of colour around the house by decorating with pillows or small furniture. And some people prefer just white.

So let’s talk about how you can mix colours to give special vibes to your guests!

THE SAME COLOUR, DIFFERENT SHADE

This technique is for people who are not fans of bright colours and prefer to have toned rooms (I don’t recommend using bright colours such as blues and yellows with this technique as the room can become too overwhelming). For example, let’s take white – the simplest of the colours. If you want your place to have radiant aesthetic vibe, mix it with other shades of white, like cream and beige. This will give your house a very cosy feeling and make your house look brighter and cleaner! It’s the same with any neutral colour like grey or brown.

GREEN, CREAM AND BROWN

This is personally my favourite if you want to use a pop of colour in your home. I think green and cream mix so well together, doesn’t matter if it’s pastel green or dark green. It creates a little bit of posh vibe – especially if you use royal green or emerald which is a darker shade and add a little bit of brown. I like how cream accents (like cushions or throws) can make your green pop a little bit more than usual. Just add some golds, making it even more expensive-looking and you’re ready to receive all the compliments from your friends and family.

GREY AND PASTELS

This is for all the people that love pastel colours. I think the best colour to mix your pastels with is grey. Why? Because then your pastels will stand our more. If you pair your grey sofa with pastel cushions it will create a cute design where your cushions can shine and attract more pair of eyes. It will give your interior a chilled look, much like different shades of the same colour. I believe that if you choose brighter sofa or bedding, like cream or white, you should look into a little bit brighter colours for cushions or throws – still pastels, but just a little bit more intense. That will help to contrast your interior more.

WHITE AND BLACK

The most modern look you can get is black and white mixed together into perfect harmony. If you want to achieve modernity, clean look and posh look – all in one – those colours are the best for it! Throw some gold or silver decorations with it and you’re good to go. Black and white are the most universal colours out there. They also represent innocence, purity and new beginnings – what’s there not to like?

WOOD AND WHITE

This is by far my most favourite combination. My living room has only white and wood around with the grey sofa sitting in the middle like a cherry on a cake. The Scandinavian look is very popular because it gives you a feeling of cosiness. When you think of Scandinavia what comes to your mind? If it is blankets, cushions and lots of hot drinks then this look is for you. Whether you prefer lighter wood and darker one – white always goes perfectly with it. So if you’re into feeling cosy in your home, try to add some decorations or furniture that has white and wooden bits.

What colours are in your house? What is your favourite combination?

How To Fight The Stress Away

How To Fight The Stress Away

We are living in the times where stressing about things is an everyday thing for most of us. We stress about children and how we are raising them, we stress about work, we stress about making our deadlines and getting things done on time. We never have time for others, especially loved ones, straight away and always have to squeeze them in our tight schedule so we can enjoy their company for a while – and even then we can’t stop thinking about all the tasks that we haven’t done yet. Sounds like you?

No worries, I know so many people like that. It’s hard for us to find time because our jobs don’t give us flexibility. Some may work in the company they hate, some might hate only their boss because they always have to stay longer hours at work even though they don’t want to. Lots of people nowadays make money on Instagram or by blogging about things which makes their living quite pressurised as they have to create content that is likeable and loved by many. And that is stressful enough.

I have gathered some tips on how to fight the stress away and feel better about the things we do.

Your Sleeping Schedule

I think this is the most important thing on my entire list – trying to get your between 7-9 hours of sleep. When we don’t sleep enough or don’t sleep well, we tend to be more cranky and easily irritated the next morning. For example, I didn’t sleep well last night and I got up in a mood where everything that my partner did was annoying and hard to accept. I was angry at him because of that but I knew that it was because I wasn’t rested enough. We become this little balls of stress and nothing seem to go right. I have so much trouble with sleeping so I know how it feels – everything around you seems to be too much. Your brain doesn’t retain information as well and you just can’t function properly. That’s why it is important to get a good sleep – to feel better and do better.

Meditation

This is something I just got into this year but it’s been helping me a lot with calming my nerves and making my day better. I like to do it every morning and every evening. It has a lot of benefits but the biggest one is that it is reducing stress and anxiety so, so well. During meditation, you focus on you – your breath, your thoughts, your body. You are acknowledging the things that make you worried and constantly nervous. It takes you to the state of relaxation and deep, tranquil mind, helping you to let go of thoughts that may cause you stress. Doing it regularly, and it’s been proven, can end up in emotional and physical well-being which, to me, sounds perfect.

Cut the socials

It is an essential thing. Social media can be cruel, creating a bad environment for your thoughts. Nowadays people can post anything they like online and no one can restrict it. It’s a free country, after all. But what comes with it is the negativity and pain. We all went on Facebook once in our lives and the first post out there was about a war, discrimination or other negative things that are happening right now in the world. It makes me so stressed just seeing the post, not mentioning when I go to the comments section. My advice is to cut the social media for a while – give yourself an hour or two in a day where your phone is on silent, your TV is turned off and nobody can interrupt you, I went an extra mile in it and unfollowed every account on my Facebook and other social media that was making me stressed and anxious.

Journaling

I never thought I would say that but journaling helped me throughout the most sad and stressful times in my life. I love doing it because no one is ever going to see what I have put inside. I can rant and I can write whatever I want in there. I can hate on people (especially that one person that always gets on my nerves at work) and she will never know! Pouring your heart out on the paper can help you understand your feelings better. You can also find writing or drawing very de-stressing, like me. The whole point of the journal is that we can get rid of negative emotions, calm down and let the stress stay within the words on the paper.

Read a Book

I know that some of you probably don’t have much time to sit down and read as you may have families to take care of or you are working long hours and just don’t fancy it after a long day. Personally, when I stress about something I like to sit down with a book in my hand and read at least two pages of it. It shifts my focus from stress to what’s the book about and helps me to fight it. According to research, 6 minutes of reading can reduce as much as two thirds of the stress level. How amazing is that?

Walks

I say it a lot and I will say it again – walks are important part of the de-stressing. Just a simple stroll in the park or in the woods can make you feel calmer. Getting a little bit of exercise is a great stress reliever. When moving your body releases endorphins – the happy hormone – and makes you feel a bit better. Just a 30-minute walk can change your mood and you will be able to return to your tasks with a fresh mind!

The things above might not works for all of you. It’s the list of things that work for me and I wanted to share it with you to give you some ideas. You might have your own ways to de-stress. Whatever is right for you, lovely! Let me know in the comments – what you like to do to fight the stress away?